Making Room in Our Hearts: Keeping Family Ties through Open Adoption |  | Author: Micky Duxbury
Publisher: Routledge
Category: Book
List Price: $19.95
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Rating:  4 reviews
Sales Rank: 135185
Media: Paperback
Edition: 1
Pages: 192
Number Of Items: 1
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.8
Dimensions (in): 9.9 x 6.9 x 0.5
ISBN: 0415955025
Dewey Decimal Number: 362.734
EAN: 9780415955027
ASIN: 0415955025
Publication Date: October 23, 2006
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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Product Description
Adopted persons face challenges their entire lives as they struggle to answer the most basic question: Who am I? The hope of open adoption is that adopted children will develop stronger identities if they have the opportunity to develop healthy ongoing relationships with their families of origin. Making Room in Our Hearts offers an intimate look at how these relationships evolve over time, with real-life stories from families who have experienced open adoption first-hand. This book helps both adoptive and birth parents address their fears and concerns, while offering them the support to put the child’s psychological and spiritual needs at the center of adoption. Based on interviews with more than one hundred adopted children, birth and adoptive parents, extended families, professionals and experts, the book is an effective and invaluable resource for those considering open adoption, those experiencing it, and professionals in the field. Openness has altered the landscape of adoption, and Making Room in Our Hearts will help us catch up to the reality that is open adoption today.
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| Customer Reviews:
An adoptive parent's perspective October 2, 2007
Heather
5 out of 5 found this review helpful
This book is an excellent resource for anyone involved in open adoption. Duxbury integrates first-person stories with information on the basic philosophy and history of openness. The stories are authentic and honest, and do not shy away from acknowledging challenges and mistakes. Especially valuable are those from decades-old adoptions, offering a glimpse into how open adoption relationships evolve over time. I appreciated the story groupings which provided multiple perspectives on a single adoption--from birth/first parents, adoptees, adoptive parents, siblings and extended family members. Prompts encourage readers to mine these shared experiences for practical application in their own situations. Optimistic without falling into Pollyanna-ness, the book touches on public and private adoption, opening closed adoptions, openness in international adoptions, how to make openness work, and needed changes in the current adoption system. A comprehensive list of open adoption resources (publications, agencies, organizations, etc.) is also included.
Although a good resource for families at any stage, I think this book will be especially valuable for pre-adoptive parents and expectant parents considering placement. It not only provides a realistic look at openness, but also makes a strong case for the importance of adequate preparation and ongoing post-adoption support for participants in open adoptions. The discussion of best practices in open adoption will help potential clients discern which agencies/professionals are committed to child-centered open adoption as a standard and which pay it mere lip service.
Moving, Truthful, and Enlightening May 21, 2008
Nicole Burton (Riverdale Park, MD USA)
4 out of 4 found this review helpful
As an person raised under closed adoption, I never knew openness of the kind Micky Duxbury writes about in Making Room in Our Hearts could exist. I love the case studies and accompanying photographs of families in open adoption because we humans are storytelling creatures who learn best through engaging tales. I learned that openness can exist in adoption, with birth and adoptive families discovering together how to best support the growth of the adopted young person - wow, what a concept! "Open Adoption," it turns out, is not a one-size-fits-all, utopian arrangement but a supported process of learning how to be flexible, compassionate, and respectful to the people who love the people we love. The family ties that Duxbury describes are the most important "possessions" we can give our children. In addition to her own story as an adoptive parent, Duxbury includes a dozen case studies and a generous list of adoption resources in the back. I love this book and learned so much from reading it. Highly recommended to all interested in the practice of adoption, especially prospective and current adoptive parents.
Nicole J. Burton, Swimming Up the Sun: A Memoir of Adoption
Moving and informative! September 7, 2010
M. Hadfield (Seattle, Washington)
This book delves into the world of open adoption and what the best practices are. It shares the joys and challenges, and always brings the focus back to the adopted children and the positive impact that knowing their birth parents has. It dispels myths that children will want to go live with birth parents if they know them and that adoptive parents aren't treated as the "real parents." It is a wonderful step on our journey to parenting through adoption. I highly recommend it to those pursuing adoption as well as to loved ones of those choosing adoption. Given how many go through infertility before adopting and have to deal with insensitive (though not malicious in my experience) comments, it is a wonderful give to give to friends on this journey to get your questions answered from this book. It will allow you to contribute to the process rather than inadvertently adding to the emotional rollercoaster that all of this can be.
The Best of the New Books on Open Adoption! February 4, 2009
Beth Kozan (Phoenix, AZ USA)
1 out of 2 found this review helpful
This book is gentle in its message, and it makes so much sense! It should be read by any family approaching adoption today. The photos help tell the individual stories, and remind us graphically that, after all, the real reason for open adoption is for the children!
Beth Kozan, Phoenix, Arizona
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